Learning boys stuff

From my fortnightly column published in The Coffs Coast Independent (21/6/2012)

You know you are a mother to boys when are you driving along and you notice every single digger, dump truck and fire truck on the road. Even when my kids aren’t in the car with me I almost catch myself saying out loud “look, there’s a digger!”

Without a doubt as a person you change significantly when you have babies. It’s a whole new world to deal with and learn. And it’s an ongoing process. But I was not quite prepared for the part of becoming a Mummy where I have to learn boys’ stuff.

I never thought I would be able to identify and name different types of heavy machinery. I never thought I would have a 6^th sense for when the garbage truck is coming down our street and tell my kids so they can run to the front door and watch our rubbish being taken away (which never ceases to fascinate them). I never thought I would be able to identify a John Deere tractor from 500m away. And I certainly never thought I would be able to tell you the names of and differences between dinosaurs.

And don’t get me started on all the other boys stuff: like how any piece of bare dirt/mud seems to be a magnet to them or that they seem to have this innate instinct to destroy things, climb and jump off everything and be NOISY, oh so noisy.

And I know my learning curve when it comes to having boys is only just beginning. I imagine in the near future I am going to have to learn things like video game lingo, skateboard terminology, an in depth knowledge of superheros (and what known and secret superpowers they have) – and most certainly practise my Lego wizardry.

There really needs to be a crash course manual in being a mother to boys. See I know girls stuff: Barbies, playing dollies, having tea parties. Now I feel all my girl knowledge is being wasted! All I can say is thank goodness for Google. Whatever did our parents do without it?

What I have learnt is that boys are pretty easy to please: give them a pile of dirt, a little shovel and a Tonka truck and they’ll be happy for ages. Just be prepared for them to come and hand you a squirming worm they’ve discovered in the process.